A Feast and Sore Eyes

Part 3 - Thanksgiving Today

Most of the world knows about the feast that happens on America's Thanksgiving Day. At the center of this orgy of food is a typically huge turkey bearing only the faintest of resemblances to those found gobbling free in the forests. I don't know how they get these turkeys so big, but I am pretty sure that if one were to win an event in the Olympics it would have to return the medal.

But a single bird, no matter how big, does not a feast make. So the typical American Thanksgiving Day meal also includes approximately 20 side dishes. By law, at least 80% of them must contain either sugar, starch or cream and no more than four of them can actually be healthy.

The meal carries other traditions, of course. For example, every guest must insist on helping whoever is cooking, no matter how clear it is that you will really just be in the way. Another of my favorites is that after the meal at least one of the older men must loosen the button on his trousers shortly before falling asleep in an easy chair.

But anyone who has seen a Thanksgiving meal in a movie knows all about this. So today, in continuing my short Thanksgiving course for Aussies, I need to write about two things they may not know.

1. The Macy's Parade. For 82 years, every Thanksgiving Day has started with this parade in New York sponsored by the department store, Macy's. This is the parade in the movie "Miracle on 34th Street", and it is generally felt that television was invented so they could show this parade to kids and keep them out of their mother's hair while she made the dinner.

The parade is famous for a couple of things. Notable are its huge gas-filled balloons of cartoon characters. "We see the parade as a huge pageant of American culture," said its executive producer in a recent interview. I guess that would justify their inclusion of Ronald McDonald. He certainly is part of American culture, and besides we wouldn't want the kids to get so caught up in turkey and mash that they forget about Happy Meals.

As a side note, you may like to know that this year the huge pageant of American culture is being extended with the inclusion of giant balloons of Buzz Lightyear, Horton the elephant and one of the Smurfs. And I always thought the Smurfs were from another country.

The parade is equally famous for its conclusion, when Santa Claus rides down the street. For you see, Macy's may call it the Thanksgiving Day parade, but in actuality it celebrates the beginning of the Christmas shopping season.

2. Football. The TV may belong to the kids in the morning when the parade is on, but come afternoon and it is game on as the NFL begins what is in effect 11 straight hours of pro football with two 45-minute breaks built in for those who wish to squeeze in their Thanksgiving dinner and perhaps later take a toilet break.

Having this much football on TV actually makes sense since it keeps the men in the living room and allows them to doze off unexpectedly without falling and hurting themselves. I suspect most of the women are happy to have the guys shuffle off into one room and stay out of the way. I am certain the guys are happy to stay out of the way and not have to do anything except to show up when the chow is served.

In any event, this is generally considered a secondary contributing factor to the invention of television.

All of this aside, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday because it is the one where family and friends make their best efforts to get together, catch up, tell stories, laugh and -yes - eat far too much. Many of my happiest memories are from this day. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone.

Tomorrow: Part 4 - What Can Go Wrong with Thanksgiving in Australia? Plenty, it seems. Eyewitness reports.