Exterior Decorator

Just quick random thoughts on this 4th of July in the US as we head to a brunch, the final event where we'll see the family at this reunion.

First, it is a very good thing that we are going to get into our house in four weeks. It finally dawned on me that LK needs a project to be happy, and setting up the new home, renovating parts of it and decorating it will be fun for her.

Because, for the past several months she has not had a house and to compensate she has made me her project. I should have had an inkling when she suggested I grow a beard. It is so unlike her that I should have spotted right away that is the spousal equivalent of redecorating the house. She's renovating me.

Then the other day she bought me flip-flops. Two pairs! They're leather, Donald, and they look so much nicer than the ones you're wearing, she insisted. I argued that I didn't want the second pair. Told her my philosophy was to buy one pair, wear them till they needed replacement and then buy a new pair. I don't need a closet full of flip-flops. And truth be told, I really don't like having to choose which footwear to put on in the morning.

I finally became aware of how full-on her renovation of me has become when I picked the clothes to bring on our two-day trip to the family reunion. Very practical: a couple of shirts and a couple of pairs of underpants. When I opened the suitcase, there were a couple more shirts thrown in. When I got dressed I wore the shirts she packed, of course, because I knew they looked better than the ones I had chosen.

And since I promptly spilled coffee on the light green shirt this morning, it turned out to be really good that I had a backup. But we all know that LK wasn't being practical. She was redecorating her chubby hubby. I suppose I should take some small comfort that she at least didn't feel the need to add a backup pair of underpants as well.

And I can't close without telling you about the Who's On First moment my father and I had yesterday.

We talk about the Red Sox most days, and yesterday I asked him what they were going to do now that their two catchers, Martinez and Veritek, are both on the disabled list.

The conversation went pretty much like this:

Me: Who's going to catch for Boston now?

Dad: Cash.

Me: Yes, catch. With Veritek and Martinez out, who's going to catch?

Dad: (getting a little irritated) Cash

Me: (thinking he's not hearing me well). Yes, catcher. The Boston catcher. Who's going to catch?

Dad: (very annoyed) Cash.

It was at this point I decided that his hearing aid wasn't working and this conversation was going nowhere fast. Until he added: Cash. The new catcher's name is Cash.

Oh.

And if you want to see the original Who's on First, this should do the trick: