Would You Like Maize with That?

Part 2 - The First Thanksgiving

The Pilgrims didn't have anything to do with the first Thanksgiving in North America. Depending on which historian you believe, it either happened in Florida, Texas or Virginia. But there are only so many myths I am willing to dispel, so let's just skip that inconvenient fact and talk about the Semi-official First Thanksgiving - the one with the Pilgrims that all the decorations show.

The Pilgrims had spent a particularly bad first winter in Plymouth - insufficient food and bitterly cold weather (which they, curiously, blamed on global cooling). When they finally staggered out into the sunshine of Spring, they had to figure out how to fish, hunt and grow enough food to get through the next winter. And they didn't have much of a clue.

So they made a deal with the local Indians and created America's first bailout plan. The details have been lost, but the results are roughly: Teach us how to survive in this place, and in exchange we will let you live in poverty for centuries while we grow rich. However, around 375 years from now, we will let you build casinos and many of us white people will come to your land and gamble away much of our wealth, making your tribe incredibly rich just in time for the 21st century.

There was much dissent among the tribal elders, with many arguing that the Pilgrims had created their own mess and why should the tribe bail them out. But in the end the opportunity to own casinos apparently won out.

Critical to the Pilgrims' bailout plan was one of the most interesting men in American history - an Indian named Squanto. In the early 1600s Squanto had been captured and sold into slavery by Englishman George Weymouth. Apparently, Weymouth had to prove to his boss that he had actually explored North America and opted to bring back Indian slaves. Given that flair for dramatic souvenirs, you can imagine how disappointed his son was when his father returned home with a shirt that read, "Dad explored Massachusetts and all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

Anyhow, Squanto finally received his freedom and started heading back to his tribe only to be captured by another Englishman who planned to sell him into slavery in Spain. If you think that sounds unlucky, you would be spot on. Just remember that after many more misadventures this guy ended up working with the Pilgrims.

Squanto is credited with teaching the Englishmen such techniques as fertilizing the land. The fact that they didn't know this leads me to the conclusion that these idiots really did not have a clue about how they were going to survive when they jumped on the Mayflower. Regardless, with Squanto's help the Pilgrims ended up growing all sorts of stuff, as well as fishing, fowling and hunting to the point that they were amazed at the amount of food they had at harvest time.

In the best New England tradition that meant Party Time, and they even invited about 90 of the local tribesmen to join them at the feast. The Indians are reported to have brought five or six deer to the event, making this the first instance in North America of home-delivered Indian Takeaway.

The party was so good that it became a tradition. But typical of the way the Pilgrims made decisions, not quite right away. The second Thanksgiving feast didn't happen until two years later. But after that, it became a must-do event on everyone's calendar.

The holiday, of course, marks the opportunity to give thanks for many things. Unfortunately for poor Squanto there wasn't much to be thankful for. Having helped the Pilgrims, his tribe did not trust him. Being an Indian, the Pilgrims didn't trust him. Before the second feast was held, he died of a fever. Some speculate he was poisoned.

Tomorrow, Part 3. Thanksgiving Today.