Thursday, June 25, 2009

A Whiter Shade of Bread

Today is Lily Day in Sydney, the first day of the Twelve Days of Lily. These end, appropriately enough, with Lily's Daddy's Day. But, of course, there are no Twelve Days of Matt.

We've postponed our dinner and cake to Saturday so I will write about the Lily birthday celebrations in a couple of days. Today, instead, I must write about a most alarming thing that has happened.

I was mixing cocktails in the kitchen this evening when I noticed something out of place. It did not take long to figure out that MY TOASTER IS GONE! That's right, the one-side-soft toaster is not in the kitchen tonight.

The cleaners were in today, and I have wondered about their honesty in the past, but frankly I cannot quite figure out why they would steal a toaster. For the same reason, I think that a burglar would have probably opted for, well, just about everything else before they were to steal a toaster.

So I am left with one suspect. And it's not Streak the cat.

Linda refuses to discuss the missing toaster. But I have read enough mysteries to know you have to look for what isn't being said, not what is. Look, if she knew nothing about the missing toaster she would be upset that it has left the building. But no, she is just clamming up. She knows what is happening.

So what's going on? Has she brought it in to have the element replaced? Do they trade in overpriced toasters like cars? Did she sell it on eBay and plan to buy a new one? Has she just chucked it in the bin because she's tired of one side of the toast staying white?

All I know is I have lost my toaster. Not a good way to start the Twelve Days of Lily.

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